Core Self & Sexual Exploration
Sometimes, I’ll have a fetish that lasts a week — I’ll explore it, play it out, and then, just like a puff of smoke, it’s gone. I’m back to my usual self, thinking, “Well, that was fun.” It’s important to recognize these fantasies for what they are — momentary indulgences, not meant to define our everyday lives.
That’s how you can give yourself permission to explore your sexuality: by knowing you can return to your core self, allowing a part of you to roam freely, without letting each new curiosity into your innermost world.
Many people seek a profound, transformative shift within themselves. So, let’s take a moment to talk about sexuality — about exploration and the core self.
Most people have a fragile sense of identity, constantly facing crises because they don’t measure up to their own mental image of success. This creates a kind of cognitive dissonance. They layer on top of that by attaching meanings to what sex should be, what relationships are supposed to look like, and even making meanings out of those meanings. But what does that say about you?
What does a relationship with a woman mean to you? Can you picture what a healthy relationship looks like versus a toxic one? Do you hold strong, clear mental images of this, or is it more of a vague idea?
What does sex mean to you? Can you visualize what healthy, fulfilling sex looks like versus a toxic, unsatisfying experience? Do you have strong, clear images of this in your mind, or is it more of an abstract concept?
Do you have a solid core you can return to after all your sexual experiences, or do you find yourself feeling emotionally needy, craving validation or some external reassurance to feel balanced and secure?
Do you tend to act out in toxic ways and end relationships rather than opening up and communicating about what you’re feeling?
Do your sexual fantasies revolve around your wife or lovers, or do they mostly stem from things you’ve read or seen in porn?
Finding your core self is about understanding who you are at your deepest level, beyond roles, expectations, and external influences. It starts with self-reflection — asking yourself what truly matters to you, what values resonate, and what desires feel authentic. Think of it as peeling back the layers that have been imposed by society, past relationships, or self-doubt.
When you know your core self, you’re more anchored, and this gives you the freedom to explore sexuality as a spiritual journey. Instead of seeking validation or trying to fit into a mold, you’re free to experience new things without losing sight of who you are. Sexual exploration becomes a path to deeper self-awareness, a way to connect with your desires, curiosities, and fantasies, all while staying aligned with your identity.
By treating sexuality as a spiritual endeavor, you allow yourself to grow and explore without compromising your core, knowing you can always return to a place of balance and authenticity.
You don’t have to be selfless with your sexuality — it’s okay to say no. Sexual exploration isn’t a requirement, but if you’re curious about pushing your boundaries, I highly recommend grounding yourself in your core identity before diving in.
Who are you?
