Pavlovian Reset Double Bind — Fantasy To Sleep Collapse

Dr. Kali DuBois, PhD, C.Ht.
Expert in Sexual Behavior and Hypnotic Conditioning

First, let me clarify that this information is for educational purposes only. I am an academic and entertainer, not a medical professional. While I hold a degree in psychology, I do not practice medicine or provide diagnoses. If you suspect any mental health or physical health concerns, I strongly encourage you to seek assistance from a licensed medical doctor or qualified healthcare professional.

Now with that said :-)

I firmly believe there’s much more happening beneath the surface, but I wanted to break down the exact methodology used and the reasoning behind it.

This is what you missed yesterday night, during the “Mend A Broken Heart” session, we focused on a technique called the Pavlovian Pattern Reset.This method addresses how certain behaviors become unconsciously linked through associative conditioning over time. Specifically, we explored how erotic fantasizing before sleep had become a habitual, conditioned behavior — a Pavlovian response triggered by the association between bedtime and a need for comfort or self-soothing.

Understanding Pavlovian Conditioning

Pavlovian or classical conditioning is a process where two unrelated stimuli are repeatedly paired, resulting in the creation of an automatic association (Pavlov, 1927). In this case, the act of fantasizing erotically had been unintentionally linked with the bedtime routine, functioning as a coping mechanism to self-soothe or distract from emotional pain.

Inventing the Pavlovian Reset Pattern

To help her disengage from this conditioned behavior, we introduced the Pavlovian Reset Pattern. This approach involves:

1. Identifying the Pattern: Recognizing the specific triggers (e.g., the transition to bedtime) and the associated behavior (erotic fantasizing).
2. Breaking the Association: Replacing the conditioned response with a new, intentional behavior that shifts focus and creates new neurological pathways.
3. Engaging the Creative Mind: Offering her creative subconscious multiple options for alternative behaviors that align with her healing and emotional growth.

Addressing the Double Bind

A double bind is a psychological dilemma in which a person is confronted with two conflicting messages, each negating the other, leaving them unable to resolve the situation or make a decision without consequences (Bateson et al., 1956).

For her, the double bind manifests as:

• Message 1: Erotic fantasizing felt comforting and familiar, making her feel momentarily soothed.
• Message 2: Engaging in the fantasies reinforced behaviors she felt conflicted about, leading to frustration over perpetuating the coping mechanism.

This double bind created a cycle of internal conflict — wanting to let go of the behavior but feeling trapped in its emotional “safety net.”

Resolving the Double Bind

We used hypnotic techniques to help her subconscious mind unlock a third option: the ability to choose freely from a range of new coping strategies. By doing this, we disrupted the rigidity of the double bind and introduced flexibility in her thought patterns. This process allowed her to see that fantasizing was neither her only option nor the “wrong” option but one of many choices she could consciously regulate.

Behavioral Anchor: The Rubber Band Technique

To reinforce the reset pattern, we introduced the rubber band technique as a physical anchor. She now wears a rubber band on her right wrist and is instructed to snap the band whenever she notices herself returning to old self-soothing behaviors like fantasizing before sleep. This simple act:

1. Creates an immediate, physical interruption of the conditioned pattern.
2. Reinforces awareness of her behavior in the moment.
3. Redirects her focus, empowering her to choose a healthier, more intentional action.

Supporting Evidence for the Approach

• Double Binds: Bateson et al. (1956) defined double binds as contradictory communication patterns that trap individuals in cycles of conflict. Resolving these patterns often involves introducing new choices or reframing the situation.
• Behavioral Anchors: Techniques like snapping a rubber band align with Skinner’s (1953) operant conditioning framework, using immediate feedback to disrupt undesired behaviors.
• Conditioning and Habit Formation: Pavlov (1927) demonstrated how associative learning creates automatic behaviors, while Bandura (1977) emphasized the role of conscious awareness in modifying such habits.

By combining these principles, the Pavlovian Reset Pattern empowers individuals to break free from conditioned responses, resolve internal conflicts, and embrace healthier coping mechanisms.

References

• Bandura, A. (1977). Social learning theory. Englewood Cliffs, NJ: Prentice-Hall.
• Bateson, G., Jackson, D. D., Haley, J., & Weakland, J. H. (1956). Toward a theory of schizophrenia. Behavioral Science, 1(4), 251–264.
• Pavlov, I. P. (1927). Conditioned reflexes: An investigation of the physiological activity of the cerebral cortex.Oxford University Press.
• Skinner, B. F. (1953). Science and human behavior. Macmillan.