The Evolution of Male Power Dynamics: From Submissive Men of Power to Cultural Rejects
Why 90% of submissive males are societal outcasts rather than the powerful CEOs and men of influence often portrayed in cinematic narratives.
The average salary for a 40-year-old man in the U.S. is approximately $78,334 annually, based on 2023 data. And that is with a masters degree. Most men make $40,000–70,000.
Now hold that in mind as we begin to explain the pecking order within male culture and cinematic narratives as myths.
The concept of a “pecking order” within male culture has long been explored in various fields of psychology, sociology, and evolutionary biology. In modern society, a troubling shift appears to be occurring. What was once seen as powerful, dominant men capable of leadership and control have increasingly been replaced by men experiencing imposter syndrome and engaging in fetishistic behaviors. These behaviors, often portrayed as expressions of submission, reflect deeper societal conditioning, particularly through the influence of pornography and social narratives.
This paper explores the dynamics of male power, imposter syndrome, and the increasing prevalence of submissive behaviors among men who, despite seeking control, are now often cultural rejects, unable to secure status or mates.
In recent times, most submissive men seeking dominatrix services no longer possess significant income or status. While the cultural narrative once glamorized these individuals as wealthy executives, CEOs, politicians, and leaders within male culture, today, they have largely become societal outcasts, merely pretending to embody the submissive role.
Here are three films where men, often portrayed as powerful in their professional lives, are depicted as seeking dominatrixes or engaging in submissive or fetished behavior, ultimately revealing their vulnerabilities and disconnection from the societal roles they are expected to fulfill:
“Secretary” (2002)
In this film, the character of Mr. Grey, a successful lawyer, engages in a BDSM relationship with his secretary. Though he holds a position of power and authority in his professional life, his submissive tendencies reveal a deeper vulnerability and need for control in his personal life, challenging the typical image of dominance associated with wealth and status.
“The Duke of Burgundy” (2014)
This film explores the complex dynamics between two women, one of whom is a wealthy lepidopterist, but the narrative reflects the broader theme of submissive behaviors within those who hold positions of power. While not focused on men, the film critiques the idea that power and status in one’s public life align with control or dominance in private relationships.
“The Night Porter” (1974)
In this psychological drama, a former Nazi officer enters into a sadomasochistic relationship with a Holocaust survivor. The power dynamics shift throughout the film, with the once-dominant figure submitting in unexpected ways. The film explores how roles of dominance and submission blur when public personas and private desires clash.
Although these narratives have been deeply ingrained in our culture, they are far from accurate. The reality we face is vastly different and more complex than what these stories suggest.
By examining the insights of leading thinkers like Jordan Peterson, Robert Bly, and Warren Farrell, we can gain a clearer understanding of how the notion of once-powerful men secretly acting as submissives in the collective cultural narrative has become a myth. In its place, we find individuals who are not only cultural and psychological outcasts but also struggle to find and maintain relationships, further highlighting their disconnection from traditional forms of power and status.
The Pecking Order in Male Culture
The idea of male dominance hierarchies is deeply rooted in evolutionary psychology. Jordan Peterson (2018) asserts that men naturally seek to rise within these hierarchies by achieving competence and success. However, men who reach higher levels of power often experience imposter syndrome, a psychological phenomenon in which individuals feel unworthy of their success. Peterson’s (2018) focus on the dominance hierarchy demonstrates how men are conditioned to compete for status and resources, but once they achieve their goals, they may struggle with feelings of inadequacy. As Peterson (2018) notes, “To stand up straight with your shoulders back is to accept the terrible responsibility of life, with eyes wide open” (p. 12). This pressure to constantly perform and maintain status can lead to internalized feelings of fraudulence and a desire to escape from the constant demands of leadership.
Buss (2016) builds on this idea by emphasizing that male status-striving is not just a social construct but an evolutionary imperative. Historically, men competed for dominance in order to gain access to resources and mates. Those who succeeded were seen as powerful and attractive, while those who failed were relegated to lower ranks in the social hierarchy. Today, however, men who rise to power may feel as though they have cheated the system, leading to imposter syndrome and a sense of psychological dissonance. This conflict can manifest in fetishistic behaviors, where men seek to invert their roles in controlled environments, engaging in submission as a form of release from societal expectations.
Fetishism and Submissive Behavior: The Role of Pornography
While men in positions of power historically held the reins of control, modern society presents a different reality. Men at the top of the hierarchy may experience imposter syndrome, but a far more significant issue lies with the men at the bottom. In the past, submissive men — those who lacked power — were acknowledged as part of the natural social order. However, with the widespread influence of pornography, these men are now conditioned to seek out fetishistic behaviorsthat mimic submission, even though they do not possess the power to control such dynamics in real life.
According to Pinker (2002), the human mind is not a blank slate; it is shaped by evolution to engage in behaviors that were adaptive in the past. Pornography, as an external influence, has rewired the brains of many men to desire fetish acts, even though they do not fall into the powerful bracket of the pecking order. As Farrell (2011) notes, men are conditioned to believe that they are the “disposable sex”, valued only for their ability to produce or achieve. This sense of disposability leads many men to fetishize submission, seeking out roles that provide a temporary release from societal pressures (Farrell, 2011). These men, who represent the rejects of the hierarchy, seek out submissive roles because they are unable to attain real-world status or control. They have been “brainwashed” by pornography into thinking that submission is a valid form of power, even though it is an inversion of their natural competitive instincts (Farrell, 2011).
Imposter Syndrome Among Powerful Men
Men who rise to power may experience imposter syndrome because they feel as though their success is unearned or temporary. Greene (2000) argues that power is always in flux, and those who rise to the top must always be wary of losing their status. This constant fear of descent fuels feelings of inadequacy, leading powerful men to engage in submissive behaviors as a form of escapism. Greene (2000) suggests that power is inherently unstable, and men who rise through the ranks often experience psychological conflict between their public persona and private insecurities. This dissonance can push them toward fetishistic behaviors, where they can temporarily relinquish control and invert their roles in a safe, controlled environment.
Bly (1990) adds to this by noting that modern men have lost touch with their primal selves, becoming “domesticated” by the demands of society. This disconnection from their wild, instinctual nature creates a void that many men try to fill through submissive or fetishistic behaviors. These behaviors, once seen as indicative of weakness or failure, are now framed as a form of psychological release from the pressures of modern life. However, Bly (1990) contends that these behaviors are not a true expression of power; they are a response to the internal conflict created by societal expectations and the increasing disconnect between men’s primal instincts and their modern roles.
Rejects of Society: The New Submissive
The most troubling aspect of this dynamic is that the majority of men who engage in fetishistic or submissive behaviors today are not powerful men at the top of the hierarchy but rather rejects of society. These men, unable to secure mates or achieve status in real-world hierarchies, turn to pornography and fetish communities as a means of coping with their feelings of rejection. As Buss (2016) points out, male status-striving is deeply rooted in evolutionary biology, and those who fail to rise within the hierarchy often experience psychological distress. For these men, submissive roles offer a form of validation that they cannot find elsewhere in society.
The contrast between fantasized power and real-world rejection is stark. While popular media portrays powerful men engaging in fetish behaviors as a sign of dominance and control, the reality is far different. The men who seek out these roles are often those who have been rejected by the pecking order, unable to attain the status or control that they desire. As Farrell (2011) notes, these men are conditioned to believe that their worth is tied to their ability to produce, and when they fail to meet societal expectations, they turn to fetishistic behaviors as a form of compensation.
Conclusion
The dynamics of male power, imposter syndrome, and fetishistic behaviors reveal a troubling shift in modern society. What was once seen as a natural hierarchy, with dominant men at the top and submissive men at the bottom, has been distorted by societal conditioning, particularly through pornography. Today, men who rise to power often experience imposter syndrome, leading them to engage in fetish behaviors as a means of release. Meanwhile, men who are rejected by society’s pecking order are increasingly drawn to submissive roles, seeking validation and coping with their inability to secure status or mates. As a result, the once-powerful submissive men of the past have been replaced by men who are culturally and psychologically rejected, unable to achieve the dominance they desire.
References
Bly, R. (1990). Iron John: A book about men. Addison-Wesley.
Buss, D. (2016). The evolution of desire: Strategies of human mating. Basic Books.
Farrell, W. (2011). The myth of male power: Why men are the disposable sex. Simon & Schuster.
Greene, R. (2000). The 48 laws of power. Viking Press.
Peterson, J. B. (2018). 12 rules for life: An antidote to chaos. Penguin Random House.
Pinker, S. (2002). The blank slate: The modern denial of human nature. Viking.